Moving forward.

It's always about the journey.

Be Well.

“People are often unreasonable and self-centered. Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of ulterior motives. Be kind anyway.

If you are honest, people may cheat you. Be honest anyway.

If you find happiness, people may be jealous. Be happy anyway.

The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough. Give your best anyway.

For you see, in the end, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.”

― Kent M. Keith

UBC. No Rules, but if you are interested here at 10...

Hi world - I shared this with the SERT Team today, but thought it was inspiring and worth reposting. Enjoy. 

I hope you’re having a wonderful Tuesday.  In the spirit of wellness I thought that I would share some daily inspiration.  I found this short article and thought it was wonderful – simple but well stated.  The original intent was to be a set of objectives for brilliant women, but I thought that these 10 rules go beyond gender and have great application to all of our lives.   What rule can you follow today?

10 Rules for Brilliant Women

by Tara Sophia Mohr

On a sunny morning a few years ago, I was out walking with three of my girlfriends. As usual, the conversation was lively. I listened to each of them sharing great ideas about what needed to happen in their workplaces, in their communities, in our country.

I was struck by the thought: I want the people in charge to be like these women: Ethical. Down to earth. Thoughtful. Interested not in financial excess or empire building, but in building a decent future for everyone.

And then I thought about our power – multiplied. In every community across the country, groups of caring, bright women were—in their everyday conversations with one another—sharing the critiques and ideas that would change our country for the better, if put into action.

The problem? Those ideas and critiques still do not occupy center stage in corporate boardrooms, in newspapers, on television, on the floor of Congress – as frequently as they should.

I know so many brilliant women who don’t believe in the brilliance of their own ideas – and as a result, don’t share them boldly. I struggle with the same thing. I wrote the 10 Rules for all of us.

Since I wrote them, they have struck a huge chord with tens of thousands of women around the world. They’ve been shared widely through social media, translated to Arabic, Russian and many other languages, and featured on The Today Show. Here they are.

10 Rules for Brilliant Women

1.       Make a pact. No one else is going to build the life you want for you. No one else will even be able to completely understand it. The most amazing souls will show up to cheer you on along the way, but this is your game. Make a pact to be in it with yourself for the long haul, as your own supportive friend at every step along the way.

2.       Imagine it. What does a knock-the-ball-out-of-the-park life look like for you? What is the career that seems so incredible you think it’s almost criminal to have it? What is the dream you don’t allow yourself to even consider because it seems too unrealistic, frivolous, or insane? Start envisioning it. That’s the beginning of having it.

3.       Gasp. Start doing things that make you gasp and get the adrenalin flowing. Ask yourself, “What’s the gasp-level action here?” Your fears and a tough inner critic will chatter in your head. That’s normal, and just fine. When you hear that repetitive, irrational, mean inner critic, name it for what it is, and remember, it’s just a fearful liar, trying to protect you from any real or seeming risks. Go for the gasps and learn how false your inner critic’s narrative really is, and how conquerable your fears.

4.       Get a thick skin. If you take risks, sometimes you’ll get a standing ovation, and sometimes, people will throw tomatoes. Can you think of any leader or innovator whom you admire who doesn’t have enthusiastic fans and harsh critics? Get used to wins and losses, praise and pans, getting a call back and being ignored. Work on letting go of needing to be liked and needing to be universally known as “a nice person.”

5.       Be an arrogant idiot. Of course I know you won’t, because you never could. But please, just be a little more of an arrogant idiot. You know those guys around the office who share their opinions without thinking, who rally everyone around their big, (often unformed) ideas? Be more like them. Even if just a bit. You can afford to move a few inches in that direction.

6.       Question the voice that says “I’m not ready yet.” I know, I know. Because you are so brilliant and have such high standards, you see every way that you could be more qualified. You notice every part of your idea that is not perfected yet. While you are waiting to be ready, gathering more experience, sitting on your ideas, our friends referenced in rule five are being anointed industry visionaries, getting raises, and seeing their ideas come to life in the world. They are no more ready than you, and perhaps less. Jump in the sandbox now, and start playing full out. Find out just how ready you are.

7.       Don’t wait for your Oscar. Don’t wait to be praised, anointed, or validated. Don’t wait for someone to give you permission to lead. Don’t wait for someone to invite you to share your voice. No one is going to discover you. (Well, actually, they will, but paradoxically, only after you’ve started boldly and consistently stepping into leadership, sharing your voice, and doing things that scare the hell out of you.)

8.       Filter advice. Most brilliant women are humble and open to guidance. We want to gather feedback and advice. Fine, but recognize that some people won’t understand what you are up to (often because you are saying something new and ahead of your time). Some people will find you to be not their cup of tea. Some will feel threatened. Some people will want to do with your idea only what is interesting or helpful to them. So interpret feedback carefully. Test advice and evaluate the results, rather than following it wholesale.

9.       Recover and restore. If you start doing the things that make you gasp, doing what you don’t quite feel ready to do, and being more of an arrogant idiot, you are going to be stretching out of your comfort zone--a lot. Regularly do things that feel safe, cozy, and restorative. Vent to friends when you need to. Acknowledge the steps you’ve taken. Watch your tank to see how much risk-taking juice you have available to you. When it’s running low, stop, recover and restore.

10.   Let other women know they are brilliant. Let them know what kind of brilliance you see, and why it’s so special. Call them into greater leadership and action. Let them know that they are ready. Watch out for that subtle, probably unconscious thought, “because I had to struggle and suffer on my way up…they should have to too.” Watch out for thinking this will “take” too much time – when the truth is it always has huge, often unexpected returns.

Clear a path by walking it, boldly.

Yours in wellness,

Anthony

Housekeeping and Logistics

The first official meeting of the Unique Book Club (UBC) was tonight and I could not have imagined a more invigorating, exciting, thoughtful and meaningful night amongst friends. Tonight’s meeting was meant to be an introduction to UBC – merely an introduction to the group of who we are, why we came, and what we are reading, but it was so much more.

What is UBC you ask? Well the Unique Book Club is your traditional book club with a twist. In lieu of everyone reading the same book and discussing we all read our own book. We bring our unique perspective, opinions and talents to the group through sharing our thoughts about the books we are reading. What was born out of a willingness to strive to be more “well” has taken on a new life. Wellness is not an endpoint, but rather a journey and we each achieve this in a unique way. Through supporting each other in being well we are in turn making ourselves a better person. In the past couple of weeks I have been thinking more about this process and I read a quote that has been a constant reminder of the need for community support and group accountability: None of us are as strong as all of us. How true. My own personal strength cannot compare to the strength of all of us and I am happy that I am on this life journey companioned by amazingly wonderful people.

Organic structure? Free flowing environments with boundaries? Sounds contrived and constructed, but I am one who thrives on structure within reason. With that being said this first meeting began with three questions: 1. Tell us a little about yourself 2. What brought you here? 3. What are you reading and why? Who would have thought that these three questions would have sparked so much conversation, but it did and four bottles of wine and a veggie platter later I feel as though I have struck gold. I feel excited. I feel loved. I feel valued. This is exactly what I needed – so much more than a book club. This is the beginning. UBC.

Here are the selected readings:

Frank McAlpin (Lady Francis) – The Chosen by Chaim Potok

Arthur James LaPan – Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close by Jonathan Safran Foer

Briana Maturi – Unlimited by Jillian Michaels

William Sisk – American Freak Show by Willie Geist

Jennifer Ellspermann – Untitled (TBD) by Jennifer Ellspermann

Mary Plumb – Unquenchable Thirst by Mary Johnson

Amy Grill –Norwegian Wood by Haruki Murakami

Anthony Garrison-Engbrecht – The Pope Who Quit by Jon M. Sweeney

In the coming weeks I am excited for us to continue to share about our books, our struggles, our successes, and ourselves. Long live the UBC. No rules. UBC. Be real. Be authentic. - Anthony

UBC: What it Meant to Me

You truly never know where your day is headed.  When I woke up this morning, I knew a few things.  I knew I had to attend a webinar that would likely be boring.  I knew I had to sit through three hours of duty protocol training with the RDs.  I knew I had a lot of work to do that was making me anxious.  Aside from that, I had no idea what would fill in the gaps to make today unique.

And when Anthony called...four times in a row...I immediately assumed something important was happening that needed my attention.  What I didn't know was that I was right and wrong at the same time.  No, AJ wasn't being rushed to the hospital.  Instead, Anthony was just excited because he was hosting the first Unique Book Club (UBC) meeting, and he wanted me to attend.  I laughed when he asked me; first because in the split second before I was scared of what was wrong, and second because I could hear Anthony's excitement through the phone.  Only Anthony could get so excited over a book club that had one unique feature: everyone reads their own book.  But his excitement is hard to resist, so though I knew I wanted to take a walk, I headed to his apartment.  And instead of a walk, I took a leap.

What I leapt into was an evening of sharing, learning and rejuvenating that I could not have foreseen.  As I sat there and listened to the stories of my co-workers and friends, it occurred to me more than once that I had stumbled into something so much more than a book club.  I stumbled into a circle of people who provided me with support, entertainment and encouragement in just a few short hours.  Imagine what could happen by meeting on a regular basis?  This was about so much more than reading; this was about living.  What a unique book club, indeed.